Where I'm At, Pt. 2 (Where I Want to Be)

from Suburban Ballet by The Real Whitaker Todd

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lyrics

[for Donald]

It’s Saturday morning and I’ve rolled over in bed for the fourth time while last night’s dreams fade from my head. I don’t work today, sunlight’s peering through my blinds and I keep remembering that someday I will die. I’ll send a message to Adam and when I get an answer, I’ll go pick him up and head out West to buy records. High school’s two years gone and my future looks bare and nothing I do, I feel, will make me quite prepared. I’m still writing but lately it’s been mostly poems but they help me cope while I’m going through the motions. I finally got a new job, but it still feels like a cage but I won’t leave until I move onto the next stage where I will not be so afraid all the time and I’ll know what I have and I’ll know that it’s mine. Yeah, it will be a long road, and for once I won’t quit. I just know once I get there, that it will be worth it and this is where I want to be. I know I’ll win the war that’s been raging through my head. The battle lines are drawn, there’s just no attack plan yet. So for now I’ll just sit beside this great big bonfire in Donald’s backyard and know that I’ll never tire of him and the rest of my friends that are stuck like me and we’ll just try to not give a fuck while Act Two of this suburban ballet makes us sad kids, we’re gonna try our best to keep ourselves laughing.

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from Suburban Ballet, released October 30, 2013

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The Real Whitaker Todd Holbrook, New York

2011-2020

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